Chapter 31

“Jordy’s right, you could put your eye out with that thing,” Tish exclaimed as she examined the ring on Mya’s hand. Quickly withdrawing her hand and putting it back on her lap, under the table and out of sight, Mya rolled her eyes.

“I should get him to trade it on something smaller, less...conspicuous,” she mumbled, reaching for her Venti vanilla chai and sucking noisily at the straw.

“Don’t you dare,” Tish laughed, sitting back and reaching to give the double stroller a little push. The twins slept better if she rocked it every once in a while. “You wear that thing like a god damned homing beacon, and even if your hands get swollen in your next trimester, you wear that fucking thing around your neck and be proud of it. Are you kidding me? That’s god damned gorgeous. Paris Hilton would be fucking jealous as hell.” Mya glanced across the small table at her friend and couldn’t help but smile.

“Your kids are going to get their mouths washed out with soap on their first day in kindergarten,” she admonished Tish who only shook her head, quite decidedly and quite firmly.

“If anyone so much as touches my kids without my say so, I would kick their ass,” she answered without so much of a twitch of a smile, lifting her brand new, precariously high heeled, Cesare Paciotti black leather boots. “I will insert these directly up anyone’s ass that so much as even breaths hard on either of them...although that would be a kind of waste. Fuck these are great boots.”

“They should be for a thousand bucks,” Mya muttered, knowing that it was unlikely Jordan would care about the cost, or even notice the thousand dollars as more than a blip out of his bank account. It was more likely he’d just be very, very appreciative of the way they looked on his tall, long legged wife. Still, Mya knew it was going to take her some time to get used to being able to spend money like that. Tish had done her best to talk Mya into purchasing a pair of ferocious wedges for half the amount of money that she’d spent, but Mya couldn’t bring herself to do it. Not even with the platinum American express card that Sidney had insisted on giving her. It was for necessary expenses she told herself, for things they needed for the apartment, not for frivolities.

“Honey, he has more money than you two will be able to spend in a lifetime,” Tish sighed, reaching across the table to place her be-jewelled hand over Mya’s, “and if I know anything about our Sidney boy, he’d want you to have a little fucking fun with it.” Mya smiled at her friend but kept silent. That wasn’t the way Sidney spent money. Oh sure, he’d take her out to eat at nice restaurants, even close them down if he had to, but he didn’t just go crazy on the most expensive clothes either. Not that he had to, he got so much free shit from Reebok, he hardly ever had to actually buy clothes, aside from jeans, and those he had specially tailored for his...hot ass. Mya grinned at the thought of the special package of new jeans that had arrived at the apartment that morning. It had never occurred to her such a perfect body couldn’t just wear things off the rack. “You two deserve each other, you know that?” Tish sighed, removing her hand and going back to pushing the twins back and forth. “You’re both so...small town.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Mya asked, partly amused at the idea of Vancouver being called a small town, although in comparison to most of the cities in the US, it probably seemed like that to an outsider.

“No, it’s just...don’t even listen to me. You’re perfect for him. You’re so not even interested in the money. It’s cute. It must make daddy Troy very happy,” Tish added with a wink as she let go of the buggy long enough to drag one of her bags closer so she could peer in at her other purchase. Another pair of buckled boots that made Mya wonder just what she and Jordan got up to when the twins were sleeping.

“I don’t think Troy likes me much,” Mya sighed, thinking about the thunderous look on Troy’s face when Sidney said he wanted to celebrate his gold medal with her and not with the entire family.

“Don’t worry, I don’t think Troy likes anyone much, aside from Mario. He looooves Mario,” Tish drawled sarcastically, throwing her head back and laughing while Mya shuddered at the idea of Troy kissing up to Sid’s boss. “Speaking of the big sweaty bear,” Tish added, raising a single, perfectly arched eyebrow, “do they know yet?”

“Know?” Mya narrowed her eyes, and then, as Tish gave her own, now completely flat stomach a pat, opened her eyes wide. “Oh that...no...no, and I don’t even know if they know he’s asked me yet and I’m not sure I want to be part of that conversation.”

“Wise choice,” Tish laughed, and then gave a shudder. “I can just imagine how well daddykins is going to take the news that he’s about to become a Grandpa.”
_____________________________________________________________________

“Here?” Sidney looked out the window at the grey sky and made a face. “Do you really think that would work?”

“Not outside. I mean, well, we can check what the weather will be like on the weekend but...we could even do it in the living room with a little work. But think about it Sidney, where else are you going to have the kind of privacy to keep this quiet?” Nathalie reached over and Mario’s hand automatically covered hers’. Sidney smiled at his mentor and sometime foster father. He’d taken the news so much better than he’d anticipated, and Nathalie, well she seemed ecstatic.

“I can’t...I mean thank you. I was ready to fly to Vegas but...I mean if you think it would work,” he looked down the hall towards the large formal living room with the French provincial furniture, the cream coloured walls and plush rug. It was the room that hardly ever got used. The far less formal entertainment room downstairs was the one that he and the Lemieux’s had always used. That was where Christmas mornings took place, movie nights, or just watching a Steeler’s game on the tube. The formal room at the front of the house even had one of those sweeping stair cases leading to it from upstairs. It looked like something out of Homes and Gardens.

“Well if someone can pull something like that together at short notice, I think it’s Nat,” Mario said proudly, reaching over to pat his wife’s hand while sharing a look with her that Sidney wondered if he would share with Mya when they’d been together as long as the Lemieux’s had. “She’s got a book full of caterers and floral companies. I bet she can put something together that will be good enough for Hello Magazine back home,” Mario added with one of his warm smiles and a wink towards Sidney, who shuddered at the idea. He’d already been voted one of Canada’s most ‘beautiful’ people in that magazine, but he knew that his mentor was probably right. Even though he wanted to keep it private, no matter how hard he tried, the news was likely to get out, somehow, someway. Even Pat had suggested that they try and control that likelihood by giving exclusive rights to someone.

“I don’t want anything too...crazy,” he said, thinking of the weddings he’d seen in magazine. The completely over the top and out of control pomp and circumstance of Celine Dion’s wedding along with its official book that had come out a week after, or even the full formal church wedding Colby had had. Although that had probably been the most fun he’d ever had at formal event.

“Well it’s not really about what you want is it?” Nathalie grinned and Sidney could see the wheels already turning in her head. “You’d better get Mya over here. We have lots to discuss.”

_____________________________________________________________

“What do you mean called up? You’re like what, over forty? You can’t go to Afghanistan. Phone them up. Tell them they’ve made some kind of fucking mistake,” Mya picked up her phone and shoved it towards Steve who backed away, hands up in a defensive gesture, shaking his head.

“Pumpkin, even reservists are going. I’m going to be working in the bases, fixing trucks. I’m not going to be in the line of fire, promise. I’ll be fine,” he smiled at her like he was trying to placate a crazy person, and that only made Mya even more angry.

“Then tell them you can’t go now. I mean, shit, don’t they even give you some fucking warning? Ship out on Friday? I mean, who does that?” Mya slammed the phone down and turned away so her Uncle wouldn’t see the tears in her eyes. Better he leave thinking her angry at him then upset like this, she thought as she brushed at her eyes with the back of her hand.

“The Army sweetstuff,” he said quietly, putting his hands on her shoulders and pressing his cheek to the top of her head. “The President says go and the Uncle Sam snaps his fingers and all I’ve got to do is put some stuff in a duffle bag and go. Besides, you don’t need me now. You’ve got that hockey player of yours to look after you.”

“Yeah but...but...if you’re not here...,” Mya fought against the tears but she knew it was a losing battle. It was most of the time now that her hormones were firmly in control. “If you’re not here, who’s going to give me away?”

“Give you...My...did I miss something?” he asked, turning her around and peering down into her face. Mya refused to look up but sniffed and cleared her throat and did her best to keep her voice calm.

“I’m up the spout,” she explained, sniffing and wiping at her nose with her sleeve, “so we’re getting married.”

“Well at least he’s doing the right thing and I don’t have to fucking kick his ass before I leave,” Steve chuckled, lifting her chin and placing a paternal sort of kiss on her forehead. “So what’s with all the tears? I know you’re nuts about the guy, so is this just hormones or what?”

“We’re getting married this weekend,” Mya sighed, “I’m going dress shopping today with Tish and Vero and I hate shopping. I can’t stop throwing up and...and you can’t go. You have to give me away.”

“Oh pumpkin,” Steve wrapped her up in his arms and held her close, rubbing her back in soothing circles. “I’m so honoured you’d even think of me for that.”

“You know I can’t ask my dad. I mean, not can’t. I won’t,” Mya sniffed, letting herself relax into her uncle’s arms. “I don’t even want him here.”

“My,” Steve stepped back so that he was holding her at arms’ length as he looked at her with that ‘are you serious’ look, his eyebrows raised as he searched her face. “You don’t mean that. He’s your dad. That’s who gives you away. Your dad. Of course you want him here.”

“I don’t,” Mya said firmly, wiping away her tears and returning Steve’s concerned gaze. “I really don’t. I don’t even think I’m going to tell him about the wedding, or the baby.”

_______________________________________________________________

There was a long silence on the other end of the line and it made Sidney wince. He could hear it coming. In fact, as he closed his eyes and pressed his fingertips against the throbbing that had begun in his temple as soon as he’d picked up the phone to talk to Troy, he could picture beads of sweat breaking out across his father’s forehead as his lips thinned out in annoyance.

“There’s such a thing as an abortion,” his father began in his deep baritone, the sound of disappointment causing Sidney to scrunch down in his chair.

“That’s not an option dad,” Sidney sighed, shaking his head. He’d known that particular suggestion would be his father’s most likely initial reaction, but that didn’t make it any easier to hear. “I love her. I’m going to marry her.”

“It’s not the god damn fifties Sid. You don’t have to marry her because you knocked her up. We’ll call Brisson. We’ll get some kind of payment arranged. You don’t need to go tossing your god damn future down the drain for the first girl with a working uterus.”

“I’ve called Pat. He’s talking to the lawyers about a pre-nup. We’re getting married dad. I’m not asking for your opinion. I’m not even asking for your blessing. I’m just telling you, we’re getting married this weekend at Mario’s. I hope you’ll be there. Mom and Taylor are coming so I hope you will too,” Sidney said, trying to keep his voice calm and even, drawing on the last reserves of his patience. There was a long silence on the other end of the phone again. Long enough that Sidney began to wonder if his father had actually hung up on him. It wouldn’t have been the first time. “I thought, at least, you’d be happy that we’re keeping it small and private,” Sidney added, the little boy inside of him still needing to placate his overbearing, over protective father. “It’s not even going to be the whole team, just a few of the guys. It’s going to look like a dinner party, that’s all. The only people who even know what’s actually going on are Mario, Nathalie and you and mom. I don’t even want you to Taylor, in case she decides to facebook this too,” Sidney continued, trying to fill the silence, and trying his best to paint a picture he hoped his father could accept.

“So her parents have the good sense to think this is stupid idea too?” his father said finally, sounding just a little too pleased at the idea of more family strife. Sidney pressed at his temple and reminded himself to breathe. This thing of his father living precariously through him, of trying to control his every move, every decision, he’d really hoped it had ended with the Cup. Obviously that still wasn’t quite the case.

“No...her dad is...,” Sidney started to explain about the complicated and strained relationship Mya had with her father, but decided against it. After all, that would only add fuel to his own father’s argument that she wasn’t the right girl for him. The fact that Sidney thought it made her even more perfect made him smile. “Her relationship with her parents has nothing to do with you, dad. Are you coming or not?”

“I’ll be there,” his father said at last, but there was a note in his voice that made Sidney wince. He sounded just a little too happy about it, which only meant one thing. Trouble. “Someone’s got to talk you out of this bullshit.”

“If you’re going to be like that, dad, then don’t even bother coming,” Sidney grumbled, slamming the phone down, despite the fact that he knew that by doing that he was only playing further into his father’s hands.

He could hear it already. The ‘you’re too young to get married’ and the ‘you’re too young to be a father, look what I went through, what I gave up for you’. Sidney had heard his father’s warnings time and again. The evils of women and how falling for their wiles and falling into their clutches would ruin his career. The fact that he’d never actually been happier than when he was with Mya didn’t seem to matter to his father.

There was no point in arguing with the man though, Sidney knew from long experience. Troy wasn’t what you call ‘a good listener’. That had served its purpose early in Sidney’s life, he knew, but he’d long outgrown the need to have his father serving the bull in the china shop role in his life. If he was going to stop being ‘Sid the Kid’ he was going to have to step up and make his own decisions, even if that meant that Troy never spoke to him again.

Sidney grinned suddenly at the thought.

A guy could dream, couldn’t he?

__________________________________________________________

When she’d gotten in Steve’s car, which he’d insisted she take considering he wasn’t going to need it for the next few months, Mya had had every intention of heading to the bridal salon whose address she had printed out Tish had texted to her earlier in the day but instead, she’d been driving in circles, trying to clear her head.

She wasn’t going to call her father. That much she knew for certain. There was no way the she was going to risk ruining her wedding day by having her dour father there, disapproving of everything and everyone. And besides, Max would probably hit on his girlfriend and then all hell would break loose....

Mario would do it. All she had to was ask and considering he and his wife had been generous enough to offer up their home for the wedding, it might be the right thing to do, Mya thought as she sat staring at the stop light in front of her. He was a really nice man, and Sid thought the world of him, but she hardly knew him. The problem was that she’d only met him once, maybe twice, she thought as the light turned green and Mya gave the car some gas and headed across the intersection and into the driveway. She hardly knew him. It didn’t seem right.

As she put the car into park, she felt her hands go clammy, but that didn’t stop her from pocketing her keys and heading towards the front door.

She’d only been here once before. In fact this was as close as she’d come, the driveway. She’d never been inside. In fact she’d never been out of the car. He’d only come here once, to get something he’d forgotten. His wallet, she thought as she walked up the driveway and put her hand out to knock on the door.

This was a crazy idea, she thought as she listened for movement inside. He’d say no. She was almost certain of that, and yet she couldn’t think of anyone else she knew well enough, or cared enough about to ask.

“Can I help...you?” His voice faded away to nothing, as did his friendly, toothy grin as his brown eyed gaze met hers’. “Tabernak. Je dirais que c’est une surprise, but I always knew you’d come crawling back, par la suite.”

Chapter 23

“I didn’t want to put you in this position,” Sidney whispered as his hand wrapped around hers’ as they walked into the hotel foyer. “I didn’t want people to be whispering behind your back. I just thought, with that video...people will put two and two together and....”

“And get four, because it’s true,” Mya whispered back, keeping her chin high and her gaze straight ahead as the few well dressed guests milling around near the elevators turned to stare at the girl decorating Sidney Crosby’s arm. “I am the girl in the video. I am the girl flashing her tits at the game. I’m that girl and either I am or I’m not your girlfriend, but you’d better decide before we get up to your little soiree. Because yeah, people are going to stare and point and talk, but if I’m your girlfriend, then I will smile and I will bite my tongue and I will put up with it. If not, then let me go home and sulk by myself.”

“You’re my girlfriend,” Sidney replied firmly, giving her hand a squeeze as the doors slid open. “I’m going to hate this, but if you can do this, then...I can too.”

“You forget,” Mya whispered back, tilting her head so that her lips were nearly touching his ear, “I get naked in front of a crowd for a living. This...this won’t be anything for me.”

“You obviously don’t know hockey people,” Sidney replied, a smirk tugging at the corners of his full lips.

“Oh, I don’t know. After all, I’ve been naked in front of the best,” she whispered back, her tongue darting out to flick inside of his ear. She felt Sidney shiver.

“Keep that up and we’ll be going back downstairs, getting a room and forgetting all about the party,” Sidney growled, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, thinking about the smell of Jordy’s shoulder pads, all the junk food wrappers in the back seat of Max’s car, the frunk of TK’s skates...anything but the soft, smooth feel of Mya’s skin, her sugar sweet lips, and the taste of her....

“You two keep this up and you Santa will definitely have to add you to the naughty list,” Nathalie chimed from behind them, and both she and Mya dissolved into a fit of giggles just as the elevator doors slid open right in front of the doors to the ballroom.

“They made it!” Max yelled as he stormed towards them, a Santa hat pulled low over his forehead, an overstuffed red velvet bag under one arm. “I’ve been saving your present mon capitain.”

“Let us get in the door Maximus,” Sidney sighed, giving Mya’s hand a reassuring squeeze. “Ready?” he asked, looking over at her. Mya gave him what she hoped was her best, on stage, happy smile. Shrugging, Sidney stuck his chin out and got that determined, don’t mess with me look, that he often wore facing an opponent across the face off dot. Then he squared his shoulders and lead the way into the noisy, festive party.

_______________________________________________________________

They did talk, and point, and whispered behind her back, but Mya, as good as her promise, did her very best to ignore it. Once or twice she felt Sidney stiffen, bristling at some whispered comment but a firm squeeze from her hand and he would take a deep breath and ignore it.

But now, now he’d been swept away by Mario to meet someone or other and Mya had been left, standing near the punch bowl, alone.

She felt like a gazelle surrounded by tigers – or maybe it was the other way around. She watched the other wives and girlfriends making wide circles around her, as if they were maybe afraid of catching something, or maybe afraid of being bitten, Mya mused as she sipped at the punch that tasted more strongly of Rum than it did of fruit.

“He’s crazy about you. You know that don’t you?” Mya didn’t have to even look to know that it was the crazy Frenchman that was the one standing beside her. Sid had warned her about him. Not that she needed a warning. After all, she’d met Max long before she’d ever laid eyes on Sidney.

“Jealous?” Mya asked, hiding a grin behind the cup she was holding.

“Hugely, insanely jealous,” Max replied, leaning in so that his breath, warm and laced with the smooth taste of expensive Brandy, tickled across her bare shoulders.“I ask myself, what has that Irish gypsy got, that I don’t?” Mya’s grin grew as she tried to stop herself from laughing. Sidney was watching them from across the room, distracted from the conversation she guessed he ought to be engrossed in. She watched his mouth twist in an angry, frustrated line when Max raised his glass in salute as he slid his other arm around her waist.

“Well, for a start, he doesn’t have a habit of going to the rippers,” Mya replied coyly, peeling Max’s arm from around her waist and stepping just out of his reach. “And for another, he doesn’t seem much interested in anyone else, unlike someone I could mention.”

“What can I say? There’s enough of me to go around, and I like to share,” Max grinned at her, holding his arms out as if to plead for innocence, something he was far from as far as Mya was concerned.

“Max...,” she sighed, shaking her head as he grinned back at her, unrepentant.

“Okay, mon dieu! Just tell me one thing.” His shit eating, superstar grin disappeared, replaced by a look that was far more serious than Mya ever remembered seeing on the stocky Frenchman’s face. “Do you love him? Or is it like it was with Tanger? Because he says you haven’t told him so and....”

“And do you think I would tell you first before I tell him?” It was Mya’s turn to grin, assuming Max was going to break out in his caricature Cheshire Cat grin at any moment.

“Well I think it’s very serious, or neither of you would be here, but I think that if you loved him....”

“Is he bothering you?” Mya turned to find Tish, wrapped in a red and gold silk jacket holding one of the twins in her arms with her tall blonde husband close on her heels. “I haven’t tried it yet but I have this idea in my head that if you sprinkle salt on him, he’ll shrivel up and go away.”

“Ouch. Such nastiness! And at the Holidays too, I’m wounded,” Max complained loudly, to which all of them laughed.

“As for you,” Tish offered her free arm and Mya slid into it, hugging the new mother as close as she could. “I have to say, that move tonight, crazy, but brave.”

“And stupid. Don’t forget stupid,” Mya added, looking down into the bundle Tish held in her arms. The softly pink, red fuzz topped bundle that was sleeping soundly, despite the music and the general din of a couple of hundred people all talking at once.

“Are you kidding? Right now you’re more famous than Sid and Roethlisberger put together,” Tish pointed out, steering both Mya and her husband towards Santa. “Congrats on the new job by the way. You must be looking forward to it.”

“Well I was, before tonight. Now...now I’m just going to be the booby girl and no one is ever going to take me seriously.” Mya sighed, and narrowed her eyes at Jordan when he snorted.

“What? She said booby. That’s funny,” Jordan complained to his wife who only shook her head at him, obviously disappointed.

“Can you believe he’s a dad?” Tish asked.

“Can you believe you married him?” Mya countered to which Tish could only nod and shrug. “How’s the head by the way?”

“He’ll live, if I don’t cleave his skull with the baby monitor the next time he refuses to get up for at least one of the feeds,” Tish replied for her husband, as if he didn’t have an opinion on the state of his own health.

“Ouch,” Mya shuddered at the thought and absentmindedly reached up to touch the top of her own head and, just for a brief moment, wondered where her police hat had ended up.

“Have you had your picture taken with Santa yet?” Jordan asked as they reached the dais and got in line behind TK and his posse. Mya shook her head and glanced over her shoulder to where Sidney still seemed to be ensconced amongst a number of older men. He didn’t seem to actually be taking part in the conversation and she wondered if it was her duty, as a good girlfriend, to go over and drag him away.

“Mon ami, you do know Monsieur Claus is not real, oui?” Max asked, still sticking very close to Mya’s side, despite the fact that she was ignoring him, or doing her best to ignore him, despite the fact that he was practically velcro’d to her side it seemed. Jordan narrowed his eyes at his shorter friend and made a face but Max only laughed, not even bothering to move out of range of the taller forward’s formidable reach. “You, on the other hand, in that beautiful gown,” Max continued, pitching his voice low, so that only she could hear. “You look like you could be Santa’s hot mistress. Hot...dirty mistress.” Mya felt his lips on her bare shoulder and practically jumped out of her skin, turning and laying the flat of her hand across his face before she’d even had time to fully deliberate on the ramifications of slapping a Pittsburgh Penguin in public, and the hero of game seven at that.

Horrified, Mya hand flew up to her mouth to stifle a list of highly descriptive curse words. But before she could turn, hike her dress up and run out of the ballroom, which had been the very next thought that came to her, she felt a pair of strong arms pulling her back against the width of an equally strong chest and nearly fainted against him in relief.

___________________________________________________________

“You never know when to stop, do you Maxim?” Sidney did his best to make his voice sound light, non-threatening, but the look in his eyes, he knew by Max’s reaction, was murderous.

“You know me, le clown de classe à vôtre service.” Max smiled and made a show of a low courtly bow, but the look in his own eyes was far from apologetic. This wasn’t the first time, Sidney thought as he tightened his grip around Mya’s waist, almost without thinking of how much that was a declaration of territory. As much a way of saying ‘mine’ and ‘not yours’ as it was a protective gesture. Max’s eyes flicked from Sidney’s to Mya’s and his grin grew, but it was the grin of the sly fox near the chicken coup. Thwarted this time by the guard dog, but knowing there would be other times, other opportunities. That grin made Sidney’s blood boil.

“You have a very good right hand, mademoiselle. Je peux penser a d’autres utilisations pour lui, mais, peut-être une autre heure.” With that, Max bowed low over his hand and then turned on his heel and, whistling as if nothing untoward had happened, headed towards the dance floor. To look for more trouble, no doubt, Sidney thought darkly as he loosened his grip on Mya’s and let out his breath in a long whistle of his own.

“You two...I don’t get it. One minute best buds the next....” Sidney shot Jordan a look that shut the tall blonde up immediately and he was glad when Tish urged her husband towards Santa’s knee.

“I’m sorry about that. That you had to...that Max....” Mya turned in the circle of his arms and laid her head affectionately on his shoulder, despite the fact that the heels Nathalie had helped pick out made her as tall as him.

“It’s kind of nice to be fought over actually,” she chuckled and the reverberation against his neck sent a shudder down Sidney’s spine. “It does a girl’s ego good.” Sidney rubbed her back in a comforting sort of way, realizing that she was giving him the opportunity to be the comforting, protective boyfriend, that it was obvious from the large red welt on the side of Max’s face that she didn’t really need protecting. That too made Sidney’s blood pressure rise.

He looked over her shoulder at Jordan and the babies getting their picture with Santa and realized that he hadn’t gotten his time on the Jolly Old Elf’s knee, but the pounding of the blood in his veins was something he was no longer willing to ignore.

“Come. Now.” He managed, just about, to speak as he unwound her body from his and wrapped his hand around hers’ instead. Mya’s eyes got wide, but she didn’t question him, just stumbled after him as he dragged her through the crowd, out the doors and down the hall.

He tried to think of the fastest way to get to a secluded spot where he could administer his own brand of justice but everywhere he looked, there seemed to be people, down the hall, towards the bathrooms, even coming out of the elevator.

Jesus Christ, it was almost two in the fucking morning. Didn’t these people have homes to go to?

The car!

Sidney felt in his pocket for the keys that Mario had handed him about an hour ago after partaking in about his fifth glass of wine. He and Nat could take a taxi home, he reasoned, dragging Mya down the emergency stairs. He didn’t have the patience to wait for an elevator.

He could hear her heels clicking on the marble floors behind him as they practically ran through the lobby and he could see people staring, wondering why he was dragging her behind him like a dog on a leash, but he couldn’t care. All he could think about, the only thought in his head now was having her, taking her, being inside of her. Even if she didn’t want it, he knew he’d do it anyway. He had to. It was the driving force in his head now, to make her pay for what she’d done, how she’d humiliated him at the game and how he’d had to pander to the cops who’d loved every minute of making him beg for her.

Now it was her turn to beg, he decided as he pushed her ahead of him towards the car, unlocking it from the key fob. He watched her climb inside, her plump round ass wrapped in that red velvet making his cock stand to at attention.

“On your knees,” he growled, glancing around the dark, damp, parking lot. There was no one around, but still.... He pulled the door closed behind him and ducked his head as he yanked his cock free. This tux was going to be a write off.

He kneeled on the plush leather seat behind her, dragging her dress up over her ass and baring her lily white skin to his greedy eyes. No panties. The thought of her pussy, bare and inviting, had been driving him crazy all evening. Now it was convenient, almost too convenient. He almost missed the sight of lacy under things. But still....

His breath escaped in a ragged gasp as he shoved his way inside of her. He heard her whimper and it made him smile. She was going to do more than whimper if he had his way.

Leaning over her back, he grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled, thrusting inside of her again as he did so and she moaned like a whore.

“Do you like that?” he asked, his voice hoarse, breathy, as he leaned into her, reaching around with his other hand to slide his hand inside the top of her dress, grabbing a handful of tit, pinching her nipple, hard. “Do you like my dick inside you?”

“Yessss,” she sighed, pushing back against him, trying to take him deeper. He laughed and withdrew, dragging her head back by her hair so that he could kiss her. He licked her lips, bit them, felt her pushing back against him, her pussy hunting his cock.

“Do you want it? Do you want me to fuck you with my dick?” he asked, massaging her breast with ungentle hands.

“Please,” she begged, her ass pushing against him so that his cock slid against her hot, wet folds. The head of his dick slid over her clit and she groaned, pushing against him urgently. “Please Sidney. Please,” she begged, pushing down and back, rubbing herself over him, making his dick slick with her juices.

“I don’t know,” he whispered, biting on her earlobe, her shoulder. “After what you’ve done tonight, you’ve been such a bad girl.” She whimpered again, pressing down on him and reaching back, her nails scratching at his thighs as she tried to pull him into her.

“Then show me who’s boss. Fuck me. Fuck me like the whore I am,” she begged, almost sobbing now as he teased her clit with the head of his cock, rubbing against it, over it, and then pulling back.

“My whore,” he corrected her, dragging her head back so that she was forced to look at him. “No more, do you hear me? No one else ever gets to see you like this but me. Say it!” She might be whimpering, might be begging he thought, but the dark fire in her eyes as she looked at him was far from acquiescent.

“I’m yours,” she promised, her gaze holding his for a long moment so he could see the truth there before she allowed her gaze to slide down, lingering on where their bodies where nearly joined before her gaze once again locked on his. “I love you and I don’t want to lose you,” she added, her gaze softening for a moment. “I don’t want to fuck up and lose you so if that means I have to be your bitch Sidney, then yeah, I’m yours.”

His heart stopped beating for long enough that he had to cough to breathe, and then he let go of her all at once and backed up until he was sitting as far away from her as he could. He was staring straight ahead, but he could hear the leather creak as she moved to sit beside him. He felt her hand on his cheek, and let her turn his face to look at her.

“You love me?” he asked before she could say any more.

“Yes, dummy,” she smiled, touching her lips to his briefly, the truth of it shining in her cats’ eyes. “I love you. I can’t think of anything but you, waking, sleeping, eating...all I do is think about you and...I keep hoping you still feel that way about me.” He nodded, feeling this enormous lump in his throat as he tried to swallow. She smiled, a sort of cat who got the cream sort of smile, and then she kissed him, hungrily, forcefully.

________________________________________________________________

He was surprised, which meant Max had been right. He’d needed to hear her say it. Under all that tough little boy stuff was an insecure young man who needed to hear her say that she loved him.

It made her feel tender towards him, maternal, protective.

It made her hot as hell to see him bite his lip and look over at her with tears in his eyes.

“You love me?” he asked, in an almost whisper, as if it were hard for him to say.
“Yes, dummy,” she replied, letting him see just how much as she gazed into his gold flecked orbs. “I love you. I can’t think of anything but you, waking, sleeping, eating...all I do is think about you and...I keep hoping you still feel that way about me.” He nodded and she felt triumphant.

It had been a stupid day. Maybe one of the worst days of her life, but this made up for it. Seeing him looking back at her, young and vulnerable, with his dick sticking out of his pants, saluting her...well maybe technically the day was already over but she intended to make this day end well anyway.

Hiking her dress up to her hips, Mya kissed him, softly, hungrily, as she straddled his hips and lowered herself over him. She had to tilt her head or hit it on the roof of the car, but with his lips locked on hers’ she was far from caring if she had a sore neck later.

She moaned into his mouth as he thrust up inside of her. By now she was so wet that she had to hold onto his shoulders or risk sliding off, so she dug her fingers into the shoulder pads of his jacket and pressed her forehead against his, holding his gaze as she moved over him.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered again as his eyes closed and he uttered a low groan.

“It’s over,” he whispered, back, offering his soft lips up to hers’ and she kissed him, softly, gently. “I’ve already forgiven you,” he said softly, his lips still brushing hers, his hazel eyes now open, searching her face. “I love you. I think I have since that day in the bookstore. I just had all that other shit going on....”

“Shhhh,” she kissed him again, silencing him as his hands cupped her ass, slowing her movements until they were barely moving at all. Until they were just being, as one, joined together, their hearts beating in unison.

“No, I need to say it,” Sidney began earnestly. “I think...I’ve decided that maybe Randi...maybe it was like a dry run, a practice. Maybe it was just to let me know I could do this, be in a relationship, love someone unconditionally. Maybe it was to let me know what it felt like to lose someone so that I’d know how much I don’t want to lose you.”

Tears sprang from her eyes and Mya felt a sob bubbling up in her throat. She couldn’t remember anyone, not even her parents, ever saying anything so amazingly sweet in her entire life. She felt his hand slide up her side, up her arm, onto her cheek. His hand cupped her face and then he kissed her, so softly that his lips barely brushed hers’ but she couldn’t think of a single kiss that meant more than this one.

“I love you,” she sniffed, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her cheek to his. “I don’t deserve you. I’m such a fucking pain in the ass and you could have anyone and I don’t know why you’d even bother with someone like me and....” Sidney’s thick fingers dug into her shoulders and he pushed her back, holding her so that she had to look down at him.

“I love you...and sure you can be a pain,” he said, smiling up at her. “But I do love you Mya. So much it fucking hurts. Do you have any idea what it’s like to look at someone and not be able to breathe? To know that that person could rip your heart out and you wouldn’t even care? That’s the way I feel about you. So I don’t want to hear about why I wouldn’t love you. I do okay? I just fucking do.”

He kissed her fiercely then, his tongue demanding and forceful as it twined with hers and he pushed himself up into her so hard that she lost her breath and everything else just disappeared.

Chapter 22

It had been a stupid, stupid thing to do.

She’d been one hundred percent behind the idea, right up until the security arrived. They were, without a doubt, thorough in their apprehension of the group of women, including more than thorough pat downs that had left Mya feeling humiliated and violated.

She let her hair fall down in front of her face as she was escorted past the curious onlookers and bright lights of the press, keeping her mouth firmly closed, even when a microphone was shoved in her face.

At this point she had a certain amount of deniability, she hoped. If she did, as most of the other girls were doing, make a comment to the cameras, she’d be kissing her bright and shiny future good bye, if she hadn’t already she thought grimly as she allowed herself to be shoved, rather roughly, into the back of a waiting cruiser and ended up nearly in Cassidy’s lap. She managed, just, to right herself with a struggle, considering her hands had been cuffed behind her back.

“You okay My?” Cass asked, but all Mya could do was shake her head, terrified that if she opened her mouth that all that would come out would be uncontrollable sobbing.

It had been a stupid, stupid thing to do.

She felt Cass’s head on her shoulder and had to smile. As if she was the one to lean on now when what she wanted was for someone to hold her and tell her that what she’d just done hadn’t really been suicide, because it sure as hell felt like it.

First and foremost, she’d promised her mother when she’d moved half way across the continent and started stripping that there would never, ever be any photos that would make their way out into the world of mama’s baby girl that would make her feel ashamed.

Her father was going to kill her, if he ever even spoke to her again.

Then, of course, there were her new employers. She could pretty much kiss off that job, Mya thought as the cruiser made its way across the Mellon Arena parking lot and out onto the street. She’d told them about her job of course. Full disclosure seemed pretty important considering she was going to be on air. She’d shown them the head shots and ‘glamour shots’ that didn’t show too much and they seemed to be fine with it. In fact, they were quite enthusiastic about it. They thought it would play well with their target market, mostly men.

Topless on TV...Mya was pretty certain they’d consider that crossing the line.
Sidney obviously had.

She could still see him, pinching the bridge of his nose as he looked away from the screen. An obvious sign of agitation but disappointment too, Mya thought as the police cruiser hit a pot hole that sent her head crashing painfully against the plastic barrier behind the officers sitting up front who didn’t so much as look back to see if she was injured.

A little bump on the head was the least of her worries though.

She shouldn’t care, she told herself, but she did. She cared what he thought, quite a bit it seemed. She cared about him, deeply and profoundly, but she was still angry. There was no doubt about that, she decided as she imagined him shaving and showering and getting ready for his big, fancy party. The least he could have done was tell her about the party instead of hiding it from her.

It just seemed like every time they took a step forward, they took ten backwards.
And yet, even though she was angry and felt she had every right in the world to be angry, more than anything it just hurt. Hurt that he didn’t think she was good enough to take to his little soiree, especially since all of his damn teammates knew exactly who she was and what she did already.

But then those infamous words kept coming back to her over and over again, haunting her as she sat and ground her teeth together. If you give away the milk for free.... Not that she wanted to believe that of him, not after all the things he’d said but...was there any other explanation for his behaviour towards her? That she was nothing but a notch on his bedpost. A booty call.

She didn’t want to believe it, but what else was she supposed to think?
__________________________________________________________________________

Tucking his wallet back into his jacket Sidney waited while the guard fiddled with his keys before, apparently, finding the right one and pushing the door open with a clang that made him flinch and echoed loudly down the hallway. His bank manager was going to have a field day explaining the expense of bailing out half a dozen strippers, but at least Mario had grudgingly agreed to drop all the charges on behalf of the club, after a lot of pleading on Sidney’s part. The worst they’d face was mischief charges now, the police chief had promised.

All except Mya, whose fine was already paid and against whom all charges had already been dropped. Sometimes it was good to be able to grease the wheels with a few autographs and a signed jersey to be raffled off for the Police Charity Fund.
“Now remember, this isn’t where the conjugal visits happen,” the guard grinned at him, winking like he knew something. Sidney grudgingly smiled back at him but he knew that the reception he was likely to get would probably be, at the best, on the chilly side.

Sidney walked past the other cells and ignored the comments about his Penguin suit and the insinuations about exactly whose date he was for the evening. He found Mya alone in the last cell, sitting on a metal bench, rubbing her wrists, her head down, dark hair falling around her face. Even though her expression was hidden behind her hair, there was not even a hint of the cockiness or gloating that he’d expected to find.

In fact, seeing the red rings around her wrists where the cuffs had rubbed her raw and the way she was perched on the edge of the uncomfortable looking metal bunch, surrounded by institutional grey walls covered in old dried up gum and graffiti with only a metal toilet screwed to the wall for company, all of the angry words he’d planned on using fled his mind.

“Ready to go?” he asked instead as the barred door slid open and he stepped inside. Mya looked up at him, surprise registering on her face before, like a chalk board being wiped clean, her expression quickly changed to a blank slate.

“You paid my bail?” she asked quietly, her gaze slowly sweeping over him, obviously taking in the tuxedo, his gleaming shoes and deep crimson bow tie.

“Yours and all the other girls too,” he replied, offering her a hand up which she glanced at but didn’t take.

“I’ll pay you back, somehow,” she responded, biting down on her bottom lip before turning her attention back to the floor. Sidney resisted the urge to wrap his arms around her and tell her that everything was going to be okay. He didn’t know if he could make that promise and he wasn’t willing to let down his guard, not just yet. They had things to talk about before that could happen, serious things.

“I don’t need you to pay me back. I just need you tell me why? I thought we were cool. I thought we were clear on what happened in that press conference. I thought you understood.” She looked up at him, dark smudges beneath her eyes, her mouth set in a thin, impatient line.

“Who are you taking? To your fancy Christmas party? Is she waiting out in the car?” Sidney opened his mouth to ask her if she was serious, and then decided against it. If she knew about the party he couldn’t exactly blame her for assuming some darker motive for his not telling her about it. A lie was a lie, even if it was one of omission.

“If by date you mean Mario and Natalie, then yeah,” he replied, doing his best not to smile, not to belittle her obviously hurt feelings. “Even with a few bank accounts I could only take out so much cash out of the ATM, it being sort of the middle of the night and all, so I’ll be paying them back for at least half of the bail for you and friends.” He watched the flame of accusation flicker and die in her eyes, quickly replaced by the kind of look that a dog gets in its eyes when it doesn’t know if it can trust you. “There isn’t some other girl out there, but the only way you’re going to know that is to put this on and come with me.” He dragged the garment bag he’d brought with him from off of his shoulder and held it towards her. “We can talk in the car, I’ll wait outside for you.”
_____________________________________________________________________

Reluctantly Mya made herself stand and take the garment bag from his hand, shivering as her hand brushed his. His hazel eyes searched hers’, and then he turned and walked out into the corridor. She listened to the sound of his shoes on the concrete floor, the catcalls and wolf whistles that followed him and then the utter silence that followed.

Taking a deep, steadying breath, Mya turned to hang the garment bag from the bars and tugged the zipper down, revealing a slash of deep crimson velvet. Running her fingers over the soft fabric, she felt her heart skip a beat. Unless this was a Santa Claus costume, then he’d bought her a dress, which meant he’d planned on taking her, and that meant she’d been stupid for no reason at all. Tears sprang to her eyes and Mya angrily wiped them away with the back of her hand.

Putting aside the fear of facing him, and anyone else for that matter, she gently lifted the dress out of the bag and smoothed it down with the flat of her hand. Dark red velvet, floor length and strapless, classic holiday attire and the right size to boot she thought as she ran her hand over the structured bodice and down over the crystals that emphasized the empire waist, simple and classy.

Mya looked down at what remained of her outfit, now stained and torn from having been dragged and pushed and prodded and then sitting in the same bench that was sticky and stained by things she didn’t even want to consider. She’d managed to wipe most of the paint off with the rough paper towels they’d given her to clean up with but she tried again, running her hands under the icy water that came from the tap, tossing aside her ruined costume and rubbing at her skin until it glowed red but clean.

Generally speaking she liked the look of a man in a well tailored suit. Not Sid, she thought, as she peered in the rusty mirror affixed to the concrete block wall above the tiny sink. He looked more like a kid playing dress up, with pant legs that were too wide and too long, a jacket that was too big everywhere, as if he’d taken his father’s suit out of the closet and put it on. She liked him much better in jeans and a t-shirt, she decided as she took the dress gingerly off the hanger, careful not to let it touch the ground as she stepped into it.

It was a good thing she was flexible, she thought as fought to pull up the zipper, sucking in her stomach and holding her breath as she slowly pulled it up.

The dress fit like a second skin. It hugged her curves, holding the girls up firm and high, before falling softly around her hips before it opened up again in scandalously high slits on each side. The tops of her garters showed, unless she wanted to go without. She was mentally counting how many days it had been since she’d waxed s she went to stuff what remained of her police costume into the garment bag, only to find a shoe box sitting at the bottom of the bag.

Mya reached in and pulled out the box, placing it down on the bench as she ran her fingers over the slightly raised signature on the box. Christian Louboutin. Whatever was inside had probably cost more than the dress.

Taking off the lid, Mya let out a dreamy sigh. Chiffon Ambrosina pumps with at least four inch heels, the same deep scarlet of the dress. She ran her fingers over them and felt the weight in her stomach double. They would be tight. Italian shoes always were, but god they were worth it. Was she?

Mya unzipped her boots and carefully transferred her feet from one shoe to the other, doing her best not to touch the floor for more than a second and then stood and admired her feet for a moment before picking up her boots, zipping up the garment bag and heading down the hall. She wished there was time to do something about her hair, but with no tools, no curling iron, not even comb on her person, whatever she looked like now, would have to do.

She ignored the cat calls and suggestive comments. Her mind was already racing ahead as she tried to anticipate what Sidney was likely to say.

Would he break up with her? For good this time?

She wouldn’t blame him if he did, although seemed more likely that if that had been his intention he would have left her and all of the other girls to cool their heels in the holding cell for the night. It’s probably what she would have done had she been in his place.

This was beginning to be a bit of a pattern for them, her pushing him away, him chasing her. One of these days he wasn’t going to even try.
_____________________________________________________________________

“Are you sure this is wise?” Mario asked as he leaned against the door of the Escalade, watching his charge pace the sidewalk in front of the police station.

“Of course it’s not, but he’s in love. I think it’s kind of sweet,” Nathalie responded, wrapping her arm through her husband’s and smiling approvingly at Sidney as he narrowed his eyes at the two of them. This was like having your parents along on a date that had gone terribly wrong.

Speaking of which...Sidney glanced at his watch. They’d have already missed dinner. If they didn’t hurry now, they wouldn’t get a chance to sit on Santa’s knee and he really wanted to ask for another Cup and some peace and quiet in his life. He’d done it last year and it had worked, and when something worked you just had to keep doing it.

“A-hem.” Sidney looked up to find a vision in red standing before him, her breasts thrust high and nearly spilling over the fitted top of the dress, her hair falling softly around her shoulders in loose dark waves and one of her shapely legs peeking out from the heavy fabric. His mouth went dry and he forgot to be angry.

“Fuck me,” he breathed, or rather didn’t breathe having forgotten to his gaze roamed over the way the soft fabric moved with her curves, reminding him, almost painfully, of what was beneath. She looked like a Christmas present, one of those ones that you get wrapped professionally, and his fingers twitched at his sides, wanting very much to unwrap this particular present. Her soft, full lips turned up at the corners and he could well imagine the sarcastic comment that danced at the tip of her tongue, but a quick glance towards his ride and she seemed to think better of it.

God, it was worse than having your parents along on a date. This was more like having your parents walk in on you 'In flagranti delicto'. The only saving grace to this particular situation was that it wasn’t, in fact his parents. Troy would never have dipped into his pocket to help his son pay for this particular date. He would have left them all to sit in the lock up overnight. Hell, he probably would have created a scene outside the bank when Sidney was withdrawing the funds.
At least he wasn’t here now. He’d have to face his father over this eventually, but until then....

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, crossing the distance between them and brushing her lips lightly over his cheek, “for everything. It was a stupid, stupid mistake. I’ve probably completely fucked myself for that job and I embarrassed you....” Sidney smiled, and shook his head.

“Are you kidding me? They’ve been playing that clip like non-stop, advertising the fact that you start on Monday. You probably couldn’t have given them a better marketing tool. As for me...,” his voice trailed away as he reached up to brush her hair back from her cheek. Damn it! Why was it so hard to breathe when he looked at her?

“Stop talking and kiss her already!” Nathalie shouted from the passenger window and Sidney felt his cheeks get warm. It wasn’t that he’d never been affectionate with a girl around them, but not like this, not with them watching like they were starring in one of those ‘telenovelas’.

“Yeah, stop talking and kiss me,” Mya repeated, grinning at him as he cradled her cheek in his hand. Sidney whet his lips as he reached to pull her closer, his hand sliding down the soft, warm fabric to the small of her back, his fingers brushing just a little lower....

“You’re not wearing any panties,” he hissed, feeling the heat rise below his collar, his bow tie seeming to choke off his air, and other things, lower things, began to fill with blood.

“With this dress, are you kidding?” she whispered against his lips. “There’s nothing on under this dress,” she added her lips brushing against the shell of his ear.

“Fuck me,” he breathed for the second time, only to hear her husky chuckle in his ear which sent a shudder straight down his spine to his cock which was now straining uncomfortably against the constraints of his tuxedo pants.

“Oh I plan to, later,” she replied, her teeth nipping at his earlobe, “just not while your boss is watching hmmm?”

“You are going to pay for what you did tonight,” he replied roughly, feeling the quick rise and fall of her breasts where they pressed against his chest, his eyes closed, trying to regain his composure before they climbed into the back seat of the SUV with Mario and Nathalie.

“Promises, promises,” she giggled, her hand slipping beneath his jacket and down, grabbing a handful of his ass and giving it a good, hard squeeze.

“Get in the car Mya,” he growled, pushing her in front of him, hard enough so that she nearly stumbled, but righted herself quickly as she made a show of rocking her hips back and forth, reminding him of what she was not wearing beneath the soft red fabric that hugged her ass, teasing him, making his blood run hot in his veins. He could hear her giggling as she climbed into the back of the truck and he knew that the only thing that was going to stop him from ravaging her in that back seat was the fact that Nathalie was sitting in the front. He was pretty sure Mario would understand.

Chapter 19

“Would you like to watch it again?” Erik Heasley, one of the media and communications staff asked, using that ‘you’re about to get sent to your room young man’ voice that made Sidney shift uncomfortably in the high backed leather chair across the boardroom table from where Shero and Mario sat, staring at him with frank disbelief.

“I don’t need to see it. I was there,” Sidney replied quietly but firmly, turning to face Mario across the table, meeting the older man’s icy and disappointed gaze.

“I’d expect something like this from Jordan or Max but you...,” Mario shook his head and turned his attention back to the monitor where the distorted video was paused at the point where Mya had climbed from the stage onto his lap. Sidney’s pulse sped, just a little, as his gaze roamed over her curvaceous backside and up the long straight line of her spine. He hadn’t been happy to be there but there was no denying how amazing she looked.

“I’m a guy. Aa young guy. It’s a strip club. No one’s doing anything illegal. I’m not even drinking,” Sidney pointed out softly, tearing his attention away from the video and back to the two older men sitting opposite him in their power suits. Sure he’d had a couple but there was no evidence of that in the video and it seemed to ease at least Mr. Shero who nodded and smiled back at him.

“And maybe if it had been Max or Jordy, this wouldn’t have made TMZ or any of the other internet sites legal has had to contact today,” Mario added impatiently, his blue eyes clearly showing the disappointment he was feeling towards his young protégé. Suddenly the edge of the table became very interesting to Sidney as he began to pick at a worn spot in the wood. “You know better. You know that you’re held to a higher standard,” Mario continued, running the video back and starting it again. This time, when Sidney managed to look up at it, he tried not to just focus on Mya, on those boots that he’d made her bring home, but on the way other people would see it but still....

“I’m just sitting there. I think it’s pretty obvious that it wasn’t my idea,” Sidney pointed out, still trying to steer the topic well away from who was in the video. He’d known as soon as Mario had called him out of practice and up to his office that he’d have to tell him, eventually. He just really didn’t want to get into it in front of half the communications staff.

“That isn’t the point Sid and I think you know that,” Mario sighed, shutting the video off at long last, for which Sidney was grateful. Seeing Mya like that made it really difficult to concentrate.

“It’s the image that we and your parents and the league have been very careful to cultivate and protect,” Erik said, taking a seat at the head of the table, tapping his pen against a copy of the letter that was sitting in front of Sidney, awaiting his signature. The one he was refusing to sign. “Your image is squeaky clean, and for the sake of your sponsors and the franchise, we’d like to keep it that way. This is one little bump, and believe me, it’s not entirely unexpected. As you say, you’re a young man and while I think we all recognize that generally speaking you definitely make our lives easy around here, we also all knew that this type of thing would come up eventually.”

“And it’s not just your sponsors. It’s those kids that look up to you, that idolize you. Don’t you think you owe their mothers an explanation? After all, they’re the ones that are going to decide if their little Johnny is going to wear your jersey or not,” Mario added bluntly, staring daggers at Sidney who was now back to squirming in his chair.

They were both making valid points, fair points, points that he couldn’t argue with. That didn’t mean that he didn’t want to argue with them, or that he agreed, and it certainly didn’t mean he was going to sign the letter they’d drafted for him to sign.

“There must be some other way you can say this that doesn’t make it sound quite so...condescending,” Sidney replied, pushing the letter away once more and looking over at Erik optimistically.

“Are you planning on going back there sometime soon or something?” Mario snapped, pushing his chair back so that he could go back to pacing, which is what he’d been doing when Sidney had finished his shower and arrived in his office. Generally speaking it wasn’t always a bad thing when he was called to Mario’s office. Often it was only to meet with some sponsor or a charity. It wasn’t that Mario had never brought him into his office to have a heart to heart but there had never been anything like this, at least not since he’d used Brett McLean’s face for a speed bag or that unfortunate incident with Valabik. Maybe the fact that he rarely had to face an unhappy Mario was what made this even more difficult.

“I’m just not happy saying that,” Sidney reiterated as he turned the letter towards Erik and pushed the paper further away from him. “That’s a job to those women. I’m not going to criticize them that way.” The letter said that he didn’t condone either the men who went to those types of establishments or the women that work in them. As soon as he’d read it, he could hear the argument he’d end up having with Mya, if she didn’t just refuse to ever speak with him again instead. Not that he’d blame her, which is why he wasn’t going to sign the letter the way it was written. “And who else is signing this, because I wasn’t the only one there.”

“You’re the only one we’re worried about here,” Shero said, finally speaking up. Sidney turned his attention to the GM and was relieved to see that he, at least, didn’t look like he was enjoying castigating that Sidney was taking. “I think Max can live without his car commercial...if they even care. I know you might not think this is fair, but I think you have to agree that it’s necessary.”

Sid didn’t, in fact, agree that it was necessary. He was actually willing to bet that just about every other professional male athlete had probably been to the rippers more than once without having to give a formal apology. In fact, the entire Steelers team had celebrated their Super Bowl win at Blush and he’d been invited. Plenty of his teammates had been there. He’d heard all about it and no one had said anything then. Of course he hadn’t seen any video of that particular celebration, although he’d heard it had gotten pretty out of hand.

Damn camera phones.

“I’m just not comfortable with that wording,” Sidney repeated, turning his attention back to Erik. “There has to be some other way to say this. I mean, can’t we just leave the part out about the dancers? Can’t I just say that I didn’t use very good judgement in my choice of establishments and that I’m sorry if I offended anyone?”
“If we thought we could get away with that, we would have just put that,” Mario grumbled, leaning over the table to turn the letter around and push it towards Sidney. “Just sign it.”

Sidney stared down at the document, the stark black and white letters swimming before his eyes. His chest felt tight. He felt hot. He could feel sweat trickling down the back of his neck. He hated to disappoint anyone, least of all Mario. The only way this could be worse was if Troy, his father, were here. Of course it was only a matter of time before Troy did get involved, Sidney knew, especially if he continued to refuse to sign the letter. It was probably only because Mario hadn’t expected such resistance that his father wasn’t standing across the table from him now with a face like thunder.

He felt his heart beating rapidly in his chest, like the fluttering wings of a frightened bird. He felt cornered and he hated it. It wasn’t fair. He hadn’t done anything wrong and he hadn’t even wanted to be there and most of all, he didn’t want to upset Mya.

“Sign it Sidney,” Mario growled, holding a pen out towards him like a knife, his blue eyes flashing like bolts of lightning.

Maybe he could call Mya and explain before the media got a hold of it.

“The reporters are getting restless,” a voice piped up behind him and Sidney turned, wide eyed to see the apologetic but still perky face of Jennifer, the media relations officer.

“Reporters?” he squeaked, his throat closing, his mouth going dry.

“You didn’t think it would just take a little letter did you?” Mario sighed, slumping into a chair and dropping his head into his hands, rubbing at his temples as he stared across the table. “Now sign it and go out there and read it and hope that they don’t ask too many questions.”

___________________________________________________________________

“Go where?” Mya turned to go back into her apartment, followed by the still very, very pregnant wife of Sidney’s teammate.

“Shopping. These two are going to shoot out of me any minute now and I still have things I need,” Tish said, making her way to the couch and lowering herself gently onto it. “I know, I know. You’d think, with Jordan’s cash this wouldn’t be hard. Get on the internet, order some shit, but there are still things you have to go get. I mean, for instance, bottles you can get but bottle liners? No, you can’t just order those, or at least nowhere I’ve found. And then I can’t decide between cloth and pampers. I mean, pampers if I’m changing them obviously,” Tish moaned, holding up her perfect French tips by way of explanation, “but I just know that Linda’s going to get here and she’s going to look down her nose at me for using them.”

Mya couldn’t help but smile at the thought of the down to earth defenseman’s parents being anything but completely sweet and helpful. If anyone was going to create a scene, it would likely be the obviously opinionated Tish, but she kept that thought to herself.

“Are you going to be okay to shop?” she called as she went into her small bedroom and tugged off her sweat pants.

“I’m comfortable sitting right now,” Tish called back, “but I won’t be for long. I can’t seem to get comfortable anymore, so I might as well spend money.” Mya grinned and shook her head. Tish obviously wasn’t one to mince words.

“You could just give me a list. I could go for you,” she offered, pulling on a pair of well worn jeans before diving into her closet to look for something half assed fashionable to wear on top. Tish might be eight and a half months pregnant but she looked like she could be walking on a catwalk in Paris, right down to her cute little kitten heels, which Mya was sure she probably wasn’t happy about. Of the few times she’d met Tish, she couldn’t remember ever seeing her in any heel below three inches.

“What fun would that be?” Tish called back. “Besides, once these skwaking pooping machines arrive, I probably won’t be allowed out of the house for a while. This might be my last chance to do anything fun.” That was a thought Mya couldn’t agree with. The pitter patter of little feet was something she looked forward to, even if it wasn’t something she was planning on now. She didn’t know too much about Jordan, but what she’d seen of him, she thought he’d be a great dad. Sidney would be, she thought to herself with a secretive sort of smile. Not that she should be thinking anything like that, she told herself. Although it was hard not too, and, she supposed, that was all part of the raw newness of the relationship, if that’s even what it was.

Deciding that she just couldn’t keep up with the fashionista in her living room, Mya settled on a black t-shirt she’d gotten at a Rasmus concert and headed out to the living room, dragging her leather jacket behind her. She tried to ignore Tish’s raised eyebrow and thankfully the mother-to-be kept her thoughts on Mya’s fashion sense to herself.

“Ready to go, mom?” Mya asked, taking Tish’s keys from her as she held her other hand out to pull the heavily pregnant woman to her feet.

“I’m always ready to spend my hubby’s money.”

_________________________________________________________________________

“I’m sorry buddy,” Max apologized, sliding his arm around Sidney’s shoulders as they slunk out of the arena. Sidney shrugged his friend’s arm off his shoulder but didn’t tell him to stick his apology where the sun doesn’t shine, although he did think about doing just that.

“We’re all sorry,” Jordan added, appearing from nowhere, along with Dupuis, Flower, and a few of the other guys who had been there the night before.

“Yeah, I wish I knew who’d taken that video. I’d have fucking fed him his phone, anally,” Talbot added, with a grin. Sidney wished he could make light of what had happened, but he was still reeling from Mario’s disappointment and having to make a public apology. It was embarrassing, humiliating and completely unfair. All of the men that were now standing around him had been there, had been whooping it up and having a good old time. He hadn’t even wanted to be there. He’d begged them not to go and somehow he was the only one that had ended up paying for their boy’s night out.

“It doesn’t matter. It’s over now,” Sid said quietly, shrugging as he looked up at Jordan, wondering if any of them could even come close to understanding what he’d just been through. Yes, he understood that people expected more from him, but it seemed unreasonable that he should be singled out when he was really the least guilty of them all. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow morning,” he added, digging his keys out of his pocket and moving towards the car park, wanting very much to just be alone.

“We all are really sorry,” Fleur whispered, falling into step beside Sidney as the guys started to disperse. Sidney just shrugged again. What more could he say. Maybe they were sorry, but he hadn’t seen any of them stepping up to the microphones to back him up in front of the cameras. “If it makes you feel better, Vero was vraiment pissé au loin. She hates when I go there.”

“So why do you?” Sidney asked, turning to his friend who took a step back and held his hands up defensively. “Why do you go there? You have a beautiful girlfriend, why do you go there to look at other women? I don’t get it. Explain it to me. Because, if you recall, I didn’t even want to be there and I sure as hell didn’t want to see Mya do that. I don’t want her doing that...in front of anyone, never mind you guys. So tell me, ‘cuz I’m fucking curious. Why?” Flower stood there staring at him, open mouthed and obviously shocked to have Sid go off on him like this. Of course Flower was almost never the aim of Sidney’s vehemence, but that didn’t mean the pale, outwardly frail youth was going to turn tail and run either.

“Vraiment, je ne sais pas. It’s just some beers with the guys, you know?” Fleur replied, raising his eyebrows hopefully towards his friend. “It’s not really about les filles. C’est une vue gentile, mais oui, but...it’s not about them...for me anyway.”

Sidney nodded. It was all he could do. Fleur was probably telling the truth. Even as beautiful as Vero was, it wasn’t about that for Fleur. She made him feel comfortable, like he had a part of home with him as long as he had her around. Not that he doubted that the goaltender loved his girlfriend, but he just didn’t see her as an object. Not even after the boob job and the nose job....

Marc-Andre patted his shoulder and turned to head towards his own car. Sidney stood in the middle of the parking lot and pulled out his cell. There was still no reply to either the text or the voice mail he’d left for Mya. The last thing he needed was for her to see the press conference with out his being able to explain what was going on and how he hadn’t wanted to say those things and he could only hope that the last minute change he’d made in front of the cameras would at least go some way to making his words sting a little less. The only thing he could do now was head to her apartment and hope she was still too busy trying to put together her article from the interview she was supposed to have after the Steeler’s game this evening.
They were supposed to go together anyway. He didn’t think she’d mind if he showed up early. Maybe they could swing by his place on the way so he could change. He didn’t even care if he went like he was now, as long as he talked to her first.

Stuffing his cell back in the pocket of his coat he climbed into the Land Rover and prayed that she didn’t listen to Sports Radio as part of her prep work.

____________________________________________________________

“Do they have baby stuff in the electronics department?” Mya asked as she pushed the overfull buggy behind Tish as she headed through the furniture section, past the washers, dryers and fridges and into sea of plasma and LCD screens.

“If I am going to be stuck at home for the foreseeable future, we need a new TV,” Tish stated, matter-of-factly as she paused by a particularly large projection model that had a price card on it that made Mya’s eyes go round. As far as she was concerned the price on that TV was a very sizeable down payment on a really nice house.

“I can’t believe Jordan wouldn’t have a huge TV,” Mya suggested, but Tish only waved her hand at her as if to say ‘what do you know’.

“In the games room for playing games on, yeah. In the living room? It’s only a forty-two,” Tish replied as if that were too small for anyone. Mya thought about her nineteen inch back home and rolled her eyes. It really was too small to watch football or hockey on. It made all the players look like ants, but she was hardly home to watch most of the games. Half of the time she was at Blush, and they had huge plasma screens.... “Hey, there’s Sidney,” she grinned, abandoning the cart in the aisle and moving closer to the screen to gaze on her boyfriend’s face.

He was clean shaven, but with one of those horrible grey knit caps of his pulled down to his eyebrows, covering the thick dark hair she loved to dig her fingers into when they kissed. He was wearing jeans and a dark sweatshirt, and he wasn’t looking very happy at all.

“I wonder if he got injured in practice or something,” Tish speculated out loud as she joined Mya in front of the big screen, glancing around for something that would turn the audio up. Mya dug into her jacket pocket for her phone and glanced down at it. He had phoned her earlier but they’d been at a cash register and she’d had her hands full and hadn’t been able to answer it. Her phone was flashing, telling her she had voice mail and several text messages.

Glacing back up at the screen, Mya saw a fuzzy image of Sidney looking up at something, looking very unhappy while Jordan and Max held him down. Her breath caught in her throat and unconsciously she reached out and felt Tish’s hand grip hers’. The camera panned and Mya found herself watching her own image flash up on the screen, suggestively sucking on the fake pistol, her other arm only just covering some of her breasts.

“Oh shit,” Mya hissed, glancing around to see all of the screens full of the same image, and other shoppers stopping to stare, as if it was O.J. in the white bronco. “Oh shit,” she repeated, squeezing Tish’s hand.

“I don’t condone the sort of behaviour I took part in,” Sidney was saying as his image reappeared on the screen and the sales clerk appeared near them with a remote in his hand, realizing that he had an audience and probably hoping for a sale from it. “I don’t condone my actions, and I am not a regular patron of this type of establishment. I do not condone those that do support this type of establishment and I definitely cannot condone the objectification of the women who work in them. It isn’t a profession I can respect.”

“He said fucking what?” Mya hissed, staring at the screen with her mouth hanging open, her eyes wide and her heart beating wildly in her chest. “He said...he so did not just say....” She turned to Tish and searched her gaze. “Is this why you brought me out? He didn’t want me to see this so you brought me out?” Tish was still staring at the screens around them, upon which that nebulously blurred video clip was playing again. Mya pulled on Tish’s arm, forcing her to face Mya as she stared at her. “Did you? Well did you?” Tish slowly shook her head, her own eyes wide as she stared back at Mya.

“I think my water just broke.”

Chapter 15

(When I steal something I like to admit it, so this is a bit I’ve stolen and reworked from the movie ‘Bed of Roses’ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SjJPSTsM7M 6:35)

“They took a break between like eleven and eight but they’ve been pretty much coming every hour since then,” Mya mused as she signed for yet another dozen roses, pink ones this time, and closed the door on the young delivery boy. “I don’t have anything else to put them in. I just sort of have them stacked on the floor now.”

“Well, I guess you have to give the guy some credit for persistence anyway,” Steve laughed on the other end of the line.

“But I told him to stay away from me,” Mya moaned, standing in the middle of her apartment, with hardly a bare inch of floor visible beneath what seemed like a sea of long white boxes full of red and white and pink roses. She had one vase to her name, which she’d put the first dozen long stemmed red roses into. Since then she’d been filling Big Gulp cups and souvenir cups and then she’d resorted to cutting the tops off of milk cartons. It really was so white trash.

“And technically he is,” Steve reminded her and she had to admit he was right.

“He must have bought an entire flower shop...maybe even a warehouse or something. It’s a good thing I don’t have hay fever,” Mya sighed, putting the latest delivery down with the rest of the boxes littering her floor. “This is crazy. I don’t get it. He’s not even interested in me.”

“Uh...that’s obviously not true. I hate to break it to you like this My, but a guy doesn’t spend that kind of cash on anyone unless he’s really interested.”

“He’s not though. I mean, c’mon, I’ve given him every opportunity to not act like a complete jackass and every time I think he might actually be a good guy, he does something stupid and....”

“He’s a human being My, not Superman. So he fucks up. You’re not without your faults you know,” he laughs again and Mya pauses in her pacing and allows herself to smile. “Put the poor bastard out of his misery and call him. You know the deliveries aren’t going to stop until you do.”

“He’s in love with his dead girlfriend. He doesn’t want me, he just wants a live body to screw,” Mya complained, standing in the middle of her apartment and turning in a slow circle, taking in all of the boxes.

“That kid could get pussy anywhere My. Believe me. Guys like him in the army...it’s like peanut butter....”

“Yeah, I know. Spreads easy. Thanks for reminding me that I’m a whore on top of everything else,” she sighed, deciding to move a box from off of one of the kitchen chairs so she could actually sit.

“You’re the one who gave the milk away,” he chuckled, which made Mya shake her head.

“You men are so hypocritical. Why can you sleep around but us girls are supposed to be pure and sweet and untouched? Who’s going to sleep with you when you sleep around if we’re all so fucking pure?”

“That’s easy. The sluts, of which you aren’t one My. I’ve known you how long? You don’t give it away that easily. You must like the guy.”

“I do...which is stupid, because with him...I am so punching above my weight class you know?”

“No you’re not. He is. Especially the way he’s been fucking up. But he is trying to make up for it My, so...give the poor idiot a chance. Call him. See what he wants. I mean c’mon, if he just wanted pussy, those roses are what? Twenty bucks a dozen? He could have had a pretty decent hooker by now for the kind of money he’s spent trying to suck up to you. Don’t you think?” Mya couldn’t argue the point and by the bemused silence on the other end of the line, Steve knew it too. It was kind of annoying, but she rolled her eyes as she pushed herself to her feet and grunted, which was as close as she was going to get to admitting it.

“I’ll go ask him to stop, in person, will that make you happy?”

“You just want to drool on him again.” Mya hung up the phone before she started to swear at it, hurling it at the couch as she headed for the bedroom to get dressed.

______________________________________________________________

“Do you want me to come with you?” Jordy asked, turning off the ignition in his pick up and turning toward his friend. Sidney just shook his head as he turned his attention to the walkway and the snow piled up around the grave markers. Some were cleared, those that had regular visitors, most were not, lying somewhere under the snow. Hers was marked with a gold speckled poinsettia and a tiny artificial Christmas tree. He rolled the batteries over and over in his hand that would keep her tree lit and sparkling over her until his next visit.

“No, I’m good. I’ll be right back,” he promised quietly, his hand already on the door, bracing himself for the cold blast that would hit him as soon as he opened it. Taking a deep breath, Sidney pushed the door open, but felt Tish’s hand on his shoulder. She dangled a garland of holly and mistletoe by a red velvet ribbon. Sidney took it from her feeling a weight of emotion settle on his shoulders.

“Take this for me,” Tish said, wiping at her eyes. Sidney nodded and stepped out of the truck and into the snow.

He took the few steps off of the path in the deep snow. It was definitely a winter wonderland here, unlike in the rest of the city where the past few days of snow had already turned to dirty, discoloured mush. The trees that surrounded the cemetery were heavy with snow, their branches bending low over their charges. Some of the surrounding wrought iron fence was decorated with brightly coloured garlands, some store bought but more of them home made chains of construction paper.

Somehow it didn’t seem as lonely and forlorn here today as it often did, but it did seem more poignant than ever, so many people to be missed at a time when families should be together, and here he was, saying goodbye.

He bent over her plaque and brushed some of the fresh snow from it, feeling the raised letters of her name even through the Gore-Tex gloves he was wearing to protect his hands from the cold, bitter wind. He felt the familiar ball of emotion forming in his throat, but today it was worse, it came immediately and all at once. Not gradually, building the longer he stayed. Growing until he couldn’t breathe anymore.

Today it was immediate and Sidney bit down on his lip to try and hold back a sob, but it came anyway.

“I really hope this is what you want. I feel like it is but...shouldn’t this be easier?” he asked, but no one answered, just the sound of the wind whistling through the heavily weighted branches. Sidney laid the garland Tish had given him around the small brass rectangle and then reached for the batteries in his pocket. He lifted the small tree up, carefully turning it over and opening the small aperture in the plastic base and shaking out the dead batteries. Just as carefully, he replaced them with the new batteries and then put the now blinking tree at the corner of the grave.

Just those few small actions had helped to calm his jangled nerves and help get his emotions under control. Taking another deep breath, Sidney ran his fingers over her name once more and then placed the one rose he’d taken from the first dozen he’d had sent to Mya’s over the marker.

“So...I might not come to visit next week,” he began, taking another breath as a tear escaped and slid down his cheek. Wiping it away he closed his eyes and brought her smiling face to mind. “I’m trying. I’m doing my best,” he whispered. “I just wish...I wish....” His voice became a sob and he covered his face with his hands and let the tears flow. He couldn’t keep them back anymore.

He was so confused. Here was this woman he loved. He’d never really been in love before. Sure there’d been puppy love, but nothing like he’d felt for Randi. Now there was Mya and even though it felt like he was somehow dishonouring Randi’s memory, he couldn’t seem to keep the woman out of his thoughts. Once it had only been Randi’s name on his lips as he fell asleep now it seemed to only be Mya’s. And it was thoughts of her that kept him awake, sweating, needing her, wanting her.

Yet, when he did think of her, he found Randi smiling at him, and he felt as if she was encouraging him. Every time he began to dream of her, Mya was always right there, near by and Randi was fading away, further and further from his reach.

“If this is what you want...I just wish I knew,” he sighed, his voice barely above a whisper. His breath hung in icy clouds around his head, like a halo as his fingers brushed the last of the snow that clung to the small marker before he took one last deep breath to steady himself before he turned and headed back towards the idling truck.

_____________________________________________________

Mya stood near the doors that everyone seemed to going in and out of, eyeing the security with trepidation. Fingering the credentials she’s been given for her upcoming interview with the Steelers, she wondered if it would get her past security, if they’d notice it was for the wrong event. Deciding not to take the chance, she was about to turn around and walk back to the bus stop when she felt a hand on her shoulder, nearly making her jump out of her skin. She spun around, half expecting to see his hazel eyes staring back at her, but instead it was that hairy Frenchman, that friend of Kris’s that had been with him at Blush.

“Before I help you walk past those guards, who are you looking for? Kris or Sid?” Mya searched the bearded face, the happy go lucky grin and the kind eyes and decided that there probably wasn’t a wrong answer to that question. Instead, she held up one of the long stemmed red roses that had been delivered and raised her eyebrow.

“I need to talk to someone about the flower shop they’ve opened in my apartment.” Max nodded, a perceptive smile on his face that said that he knew all about the massive and ongoing flower deliveries.

“Tell you what, I’ll get you inside where it’s warm, and then I’ll bring him to you. I’m guessing you two will want a little...privacy for this conversation?”

Mya nodded and accepted the arm he offered. She linked her arm with his and together they walked right past the guards. In fact, both of the big burly men that made way for them, pushing the doors open for them like they were royalty, gave him the kind of smile that suggested Max was a lady killer, the type of guy who would bring a pretty girl in before a game just to help him ‘loosen up’. Mya ignored the way they looked at her. It didn’t really matter what they thought of her right now. She wasn’t sure they’d ever see her again anyway.

In fact she hadn’t really made up her mind what she was going to say to Sidney when she did see him. She hadn’t really thought past this, getting inside. She’d almost made up her mind that she was going to have to wait for him to come out and even then, she hadn’t figured out how to make him see her past all the other girls standing behind the security gates. Now that Max had lead her inside and she was suddenly at the centre of what seemed like a bustling bee-hive, her mind was racing.

“I’ll leave you here,” Max said, bending his head near to hers’ so that he wasn’t overheard by the passing equipment guys and the nearby reporters hovering outside their dressing room. He escorted her into what looked a lot like a doctor’s office, complete with examining table, all kinds of dressing for wounds, tongue depressors and bottle after bottle of muscle rub. “Let me go see if Sid’s here yet.” He closed the door behind him, leaving her standing in the room, alone.

The room was warm, almost oppressively so. Mya shucked her heavy winter coat, laying it across the table. She thought about taking off her toque, but decided against it, telling herself she wouldn’t be here for long, and besides she hadn’t brought a brush with her.

Turning back towards the door, Mya was pulling off her black leather gloves when the door opened, almost as if it was being wrenched off of its’ hinges, slamming into the wall behind it with a resounding crash. Mya yelped, her heart pounding with surprise as she turned to see Sidney skidding into the room in his stocking feet.

Damn. It was so unfair how hot he looked in the body hugging black spandex. Mya had to remind herself that she was angry at him, even though her body was reacting in ways that were the opposite of annoyed and the fact that he was giving her simple black dress and matching black leggings the long once over was not helping in the least.

“This has to stop,” she said, holding the single red rose towards him, trying to sound stern. His gaze focussed on the rose for a moment before he finally met her gaze. “My apartment looks like a funeral home.”

“You said to stay away. I had to do something to get you to talk to me,” he began, looking a little too pleased with how well his plan had turned out as far as Mya was concerned.

“I don’t get it,” Mya sighed, twirling the rose between her fingers as she looked down at it, mostly to stop herself from staring lustily at the way his muscular chest looked in that clinging spandex shirt. “You’re supposed to be the most eligible bachelor in the State. Why are you doing this? Why are you wasting this on me?”

“I don’t think I’m wasting anything,” he replied softly, taking the few steps necessary to close the distance between them, carefully plucking the rose from her hand and placing it on the examination table before reaching to tug the knit cap from her head, his other hand brushing through her hair. Mya’s breath caught in her throat as his gaze settled back on her face. He looked so...he looked like he was looking at something...beautiful, wonderful and he was looking at her.

______________________________________________________________

“Your girlfriend’s here,” Max grinned, kicking him in the shin with the toe of his dress shoe. Sidney looked up at him, his hands still tugging up his sport sock.

“Girlfriend?” Sidney asked, narrowing his eyes at his friend, ready for the barb he was sure was going to follow.

“Yeah, that girl you and Kris have been seeing. The one from Blush, she’s waiting in the training room.”

Sidney didn’t need to hear more than that, he was already on his feet and half way down the hall, skidding around the corner, nearly running into Mario who caught his young star in his hands.

“Running? In your socks? I thought it was Austin for a moment.” Mario looked amused, to anyone who didn’t know him as well as Sidney did, but his young charge could see the tension around Mario’s blue eyes, the tightness to his lips. “Since when did jogging around the corridors become part of your pre-game ritual?”

“Always?” Sidney said hopefully, bouncing on the spot, eager to be further down the hall, to see her, to explain. Mario gazed at him intently, his icy blue eyes searching Sidney’s face. For his part, Sidney tried not to let the older man see just how eager he was to escape. Mario would want him to be focussed on the game. Mid day games were difficult enough. They threw a player’s schedule off, fucked with his rituals and everyone knew just how tightly Sidney stuck to his rituals, how superstitious he was. Mario would worry. Sid wasn’t. It was something he’d learned with Randi. Sometimes it was good to throw caution to the wind, change shit up.

Besides, he felt quite sure if he could just explain to Mya, if she would see, if they could come to some sort of agreement before he had to go out on the ice, that he wouldn’t just be skating out there. He’d be flying.

“Pre game warm-up in twenty minutes,” Mario said quietly, lifting his big, heavy hand from Sidney’s shoulder and patting his cheek, like he would with Austin when he was letting him get away with something behind Nathalie’s back. Sidney grinned up at him, just as Austin would do, and then raced down the hallway, skidding to a stop in front of the trainer’s room, pulling the door open using his momentum, sending it crashing into the wall.

She looked...amazing. She looked like the cover of some high fashion magazine standing there in knee high riding boots, skin tight black leggings and a simple black dress that hugged her curves and then fell away in a gentle slope from her waist. Her hair was down, with snow still clinging to the dark waves here and there, a purple knit cap pulled down so it was almost like bangs.

She was staring at him, hunger coming off of her in waves, but she didn’t move, didn’t run towards him and cover him with kisses. That only happened in movies anyway. He hadn’t expected that. What she did do was pick up a single rose from where she’d laid her jacket and she held it out to him, her face not quite as blank a canvas as he guessed she wanted it to be.

“This has to stop,” she said, her voice seeming not quite as steady as she probably hoped it sounded to him. “My apartment looks like a funeral home.” He had imagined laying her down on a sea of rose petals. He pictured it now, her pale skin pressed down on a sea of red, like her lips. He wanted very much to kiss those lips now.

“You said to stay away. I had to do something to get you to talk to me.” He couldn’t help but smile as he watched the way his words irritated her, making her cute little nose scrunch up, her green eyes narrow. She wanted to be mad at him, her hand even squeezed harder around the stem of the rose, but her eyes were saying something else entirely.

“I don’t get it.” She was still trying to look angry, but her eyes were wandering over his chest, his shoulders, and downwards. He didn’t think about it much, but he’d seen a few women reporters checking him out when he was in his under armour. He’d felt a little uncomfortable then. He didn’t now. In fact, he stood straighter, and he took a deep breath, making his chest fill out. “You’re supposed to be the most eligible bachelor in the State. Why are you doing this? Why are you wasting this on me?”

Wasting it? He almost laughed, but managed to bite down on his bottom lip and keep his thoughts to himself as he crossed the floor towards her. He took the rose from her hand and put it on the table on top of her jacket and reached up to pull off the knit cap that was covering her beautiful hair.

“I don’t think I’m wasting anything,” he assured her as he ran his fingers through her hair, easing the static electricity that had some of it standing up on end, smoothing it, feeling the silky weight of it running through his fingers. For just one brief moment, he thought that this felt nothing like how he’d felt for Randi, and then he chased that thought away by kissing Mya, catching her lips with his and kissing her until he couldn’t breathe.

“Don’t...don’t play with me Crosby,” she whispered, her eyes having closed and stayed closed. “Before you rip my heart out...please just...think about it.” Her cheek was resting his hand and she had such a pained look on her face that it made him want to wrap her up in his arms and cotton wool and bubble wrap and never let anything hurt her again. He’d done it though and he had to undo it. He had to take the pain out of her face and out of her heart.

“I’ve thought about it...about you.... I’ve thought about pretty much nothing else since we made love and...I didn’t think I was ready but...I am...I am now,” he whispered, brushing his lips over her cheek, the shell of her ear, the soft velvet of her eyelids. She looked up at him, her emerald eyes flashing a warning, but the deep hurt, and the hunger mixed there were all the warning he needed. “I’m ready to prove it to you. Just...stay, watch the game and then after...we’ll talk, all night if we have to...although I sort of hope it won’t take all night,” he added breathlessly as he became all too aware of the soft curves of her body pressed up against his.

“If you hurt me again,” she whispered, the admonition in her eyes turning them into dark jewels, “you’ll never see me again.” He nodded, a shiver running down his spine. It was a threat he believed.

“Heard and understood,” he promised, cupping her face in his hands and searching her gaze, hoping she could see exactly how serious he was taking her warning.

“Then I’ll stay...and we’ll talk about this...whatever this is,” she added in a hoarse whisper, disengaging herself and taking a step back, giving them both room to breathe.

“I’ll have someone take you up to the box. I’ll see you after the game,” he smiled, letting go of breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. She nodded, reaching for her jacket and draping it over her arm, like a shield, in front of her. He noted the body language, knowing he had his work cut out for him later, and then turned to go.

“You’ll call the florist?” she called after him. “Tell them the stop delivering the flowers?”

“I promise,” he grinned, turning back to her. “But I’m glad they worked.” She rolled her eyes at him but she smiled all the same, and already he felt just a little like floating.